Desaparesidos, Chapt 2, Excerpt 2

Mula pa rin sa ikawalang kabanata 

Simple lang ang bahay ng mga magulang ni Roy: isang karaniwang bahay-probinsiya na yari sa kahoy at kawayan. Abot-tanaw ang bukid na nememerde sa palay ng mga panahong iyon. Malamig ang dampi ng hanging labas-masok sa maluluwang na bintana. Nag-alala si Anna na baka minsa’y bumababa ang temperatura dito sa lamig na di-kayang harangin ng mga kumot at pranela. Baka ginawin ang anak niya. Yayakapin kaya ng dalawang babaing ito ang anak niya para di masyadong ginawin?

“Hindi nila sinabi sa akin na buntis ka,” matapat na sabi niya kay Karla nang magkasarilinan sila. “Paano ko iiwan sa ‘yo ang anak ko, buntis ka pala?”

“Kaya ko iyan,” nakatawang pangako ni Karla. “Hindi naman ako hirap magbuntis.”

Kinuha ni Karla ang anak niya. Pinagkasuri-suri muna ng bilog na bilog na mga mata ng anak niya si Karla, bago sumama din.

“Tignan mo, sumama agad sa akin,” pinagmasdan ni Karla ang bata. “Kamukha siya ni Nonong.”

Parang kinurot ang puso ni Anna sa pagkabanggit sa pangalan ni Nonong.

“Dinaramdam ko ang nangyari kay Nonong.”

Tumingin siya sa malayo at nag-isip ng masaya. Ang sarap sigurong manirahan dito, tiyak na aantukin ka sa tanghali. Naku, aratiles, o… ang pula-pula na ng mga bunga! Siguro sa gabi, naglipana dito ang alitaptap. Ang hilig-hilig ko pa namang panoorin ang mga alitaptap! Ikaw, Karla, mahilig ka rin ba sa mga alitaptap na tulad ko?

“Dadating din ang araw ng paghihiganti, Ka Leila,” sinabi iyon ni Karla sa paraan ng mataimtim na pangako.

Sinikap niyang ngumiti. Tinatanggap ang mga kamatayan sa loob ng kilusan. Hindi iniiyakan nang matagal, hindi pinag-uusapan nang madalas.

“Salamat,” sabi niya.

Iniangat ni Karla ang bata, saglit na muling pinagmasdan at niyakap. Nakangiti na ito nang tumingin sa kanya. “Ano ang pangalan ng anak mo?”

“Malaya.”

Nagulat, tumawa nang mahina si Karla. “Magkatukayo pa pala sila ng magiging baby ko,” hinalikan nito si Malaya. “Di bale, puwede naman kayong magsukob sa pangalan… magsukob sa iisang bandila ng pakikibaka.”

Ewan niya kung bakit at paano pero biglang-bigla, dinapuan siya ng isang uri ng kaba na nagpaalsa sa mga kilabot ng kanyang balat. Na baka hindi na sila muling magkita pa ng kanyang si Malaya!

Desaparesidos, Chapt 2, Excerpt 1

Mula sa ikalawang kabanata

…

HINDI tanga ang militar. Bigo man silang “pakantahin” si Tatay Dencio, kinamatayan man nito ang pagtatakip sa manugang at mga kasamahan nito, alam nila na hindi nito matutunton ang anak kung walang rebelde sa loob mismo ng munisipalidad. Pinaghinalaan nila ang mga tagabaryo, tinalasan ang mata at pakiramdam laban sa bawat isang lalaki, babae, bata, at matanda. Ginawang suwertihan na lang ang laban. Alaberde na lang, bahala na si Batman! Sayang na lang na sila’y sundalo kung hindi nila kayang ipagtanggol ang bayan! Sinona ang mga baryo, pinababa at minasaker ang maraming ama, hinamlet ang iba pa, hinugot ang mga tao sa katwiran na hindi mabubuhay ang isda kung walang tubig; hindi makakapamayagpag ang mga rebelde kung walang taong-bayan na kukupkop at magpapakain sa kanila.Tumawid ang gulo hanggang kabilang munisipalidad. Dinukot ang political officer ng isang unit at ni bangkay nito ay hindi na nakita pa. Ni-raid ang bahay ng isang kaalyado na ipinapalagay pa naman nila na pinaka-safe sa lahat ng posibleng takbuhan sa pinakagipit na kalagayan… paano nangyari na kung alin pa ang iniisip nilang pinaka-safe, ay siya pang unang napasok ng mga kaaway?

“Pinagdodoble-ingat tayo ng mga nasa itaas. May ajax daw sa atin.”

Napatingin siya sa mukha ni Roy. Napatingin din kay Roy ang iba pa. May kabadong tanong na sumungaw sa mukha ng bawa’t isa. ako ba iyon? Pinaghihinalaan n’yo ba ako, kasama?

“Kailangan din nating lumipat ng lugar. Anim na buwan na tayo dito, baka tukoy na tayo. Mainit ang kalagayan.”

Napayakap nang mahigpit si Anna sa anak. Paano na sila ng baby niya?

“Paano na kami ng baby ko, Ka Roy?”

“Gusto mo ba munang lumabas?”

Natigilan siya sa tanong, nagtalo ang isip sa pagitan ng oo at hindi. Nababasa ba ni Roy sa mukha niya na paminsan-minsan, sumasagi din sa isip niya na gusto muna niyang lumabas alang-alang sa kanyang anak?

Pero, saan naman sila pupunta ng baby niya? Uuwi ba siya sa bahay ng kanyang mga magulang? Delikado siya roon, na-raid na iyon noon. Saka hindi niya alam kung welcome pa siya sa magulang. Ang alam niya hanggang ngayon, sinisisi siya ng tatay niya na kung hindi sa “kalokohan” niya, hindi magugulo pati ang buhay ng lahat.

Kung mananatili naman siya dito, paano ang baby niya? Paano ang kaligtasan ng baby niya?

“Iniisip ko lang ang baby ko,” sabi niya.

“Maiintindihan namin kung gusto mo munang lumabas.”

“Baka pagsisihan ko. Baka araw-araw, gusto kong bumalik.”

“Kailangan ka namin dito, Ka Leila.” Leila ang pangalan niya sa kilusan. Walang taga-kilusan na gumagamit ng tunay na pangalan.

…
 

An Older Interview: Who’s Afraid of Lualhati Bautista?, Part 2

Continued from yesterday…

Original source here.

What is your writing style? Do you, say, start work on a novel and then at mid-point, leave it for a while and start another one? I don’t do that. I finish one thing at a time, I don’t overlap writing commitments. For instance, at the moment, I’m supposed to finish seven scripts for the NCCA. I’ve already done two, five more to go. So I tell people I can’t start work on another project for the next two months. By then, however, I’ve already set my priorities for the succeeding periods of time. And if I don’t like certain projects, I tell people right away. Interest in a project, for me, is very important. If I have the slightest doubt about a project, I don’t accept it.

Favorite work
From everything you’ve written, do you have any favorite literary work?
Ah, ‘yong ‘’Bata, Bata…'’ pa rin. “yong ‘’Deakada,'’ mahal na mahal ko ‘yon. With ‘’Bata, Bata…,'’ my enthusiasm never died down. When we were doing the movie, I was attending presscons and premieres. Of course, I also treasure my having done ‘’Dekada,'’ but ‘’Bata, Bata…'’ had created a greater impact in the market.

How would you describe your style in writing? Any disciplines you observe?
None. Even with young writers, I tell them not to observe any guidelines. They should feel free, they should experiment. They should discover and develop their own bent.

Can you cite two things you love about yourself?
I love feeling free. I love locking myself up in my room. I love being able to go wherever I want to go and be with the people I want to be with.

Two things you hate?
My smoking, I’ve long wanted to give it up. And then there are the tantrums I can’t control. I wish I could be a more diplomatic person. Like Marilou Diaz-Abaya, she can say anything in a nice way. For example, I wouldn’t be reluctant to ask at the recent Famas awards: How could I win for Best Story when I was not even nominated in the Best Screenplay category? It is through the screenplay that one learns about the story.

Citations
‘’Bata, Bata…'’ garnered a lot of citations from award-giving bodies this year…
It won Best Picture and Best Screenplay from the Urian. Best Picture and Best Screenplay from the Young Critics Circle. From the Famas, Best Story.

Where did you get your idea for writing ‘’Bata, Bata?'’
The idea came from a long period of experiences of being a woman. When I was a young girl, the little boys would jump over flower pots and people would think that was OK. But when I did it, they would say: ‘’Ka babae mong tao, ginagawa mo ‘yan!'’ And then, the young boys could slip a note into young girls’ books to propose, but people wouldn’t expect young girls to do the same.

If we were in an ideal world, you would say that even the girls would have the right to propose?
I have taken that right a long time ago!

How much of yourself do you see in Lea Bustamante?
A big part. Everybody’s been accusing me of that. A lot of her feelings and sentiments are mine. She had my heart.

When I was reading your novel, I told myself that what I was reading was true. That the writer was not simply fabricating things.
Through Lea, I had an opportunity to say whatever was on my mind. Like, when we’re mad, we curse.

I read a lot of that in your novel.

Real life
That happens in real life. So why should it be any different in a novel or a movie?

When Raffy and Ding were leaving Lea, she didn’t fight for the custody of her two children, she allowed them to make their own decision. Would you have done the same thing in real life?

Lea is confident of herself. She trusts in the love that she has shown her children.

The last time we talked, you were saying that you were working on a new novel.
Not exactly new. I started working on it in 1993, but I’m not done yet. I can’t tell you the theme for ‘’security'’ reasons.

How does the rest of 1999 appear to you?
There’s still a lot to be done. It was high gear in 1998, and it’s spilling over to 1999. But probably, in the next few months, I’ll declare a time-out. I need time for myself!

('’Bata, Bata…'’ the stage play, will be shown in August, 1999 at the UP, AFP and Greenhills theaters. For inquiries, please call 893-4492.)

For bulk orders and discounts, please call Cacho Publishing House, +632/6318361 or fax +632/6315244.
 

Desaparesidos, Chapt 1, Excerpt 2

. . . Biglang naisip ni Anna na baka hindi lang nagugulat ang mga dayuhan dahil matagal na nilang “alam” na primitibo naman ang Pilipinas, uncivilized, at kumakain talaga ng tao. Nakaramdam siya ng pagkapahiya. Biglang gusto niyang tumindig at sabihin: “Excuse me, ladies and gentlemen, sa mga vigilante group lang po iyon. Hindi pa lahat kami, gano’n. Sila lang po ang cannibal; hindi po lahat kami. Excuse me, ladies and gentlemen!”   

“This one is Anna’s husband.”    

Napaangat ang mukha ni Anna. Tumahip ang dibdib niya, malakas, mabilis, kabit-kabit. Dalawampung taon mula nang mangyari iyon at hindi pa rin niya maiwasan ang parang tarak ng patalim sa puso niya.    

Tuluy-tuloy ang pagsasalita ni Sister Lourdes. “He was killed by soldiers of the 24th Infantry Battalion. His body was displayed at the town plaza. Inspite of the very tight security, a visiting photographer somehow managed to take this picture. Anna, would you like to talk a little about Nonong?”

 Nakatingin na kay Anna ang lahat. Sa kanya nakatingin si Sister Lourdes at iglap, alam ng mga bisita na siya na iyon, siya si Anna. . . .

Gusto niyang sitahin, pagalitan, si Sister Lourdes. Kung magreport ka ng tungkol sa mga pinatay, parang nagrereport ka lang ng lagay ng panahon. Parang hindi mo na feel, Sister. Parang wala naman sila talaga sa puso mo.

May nagsalita ng “never mind”. Boses-lalaki, boses-kano. “She can talk about him later, when we hear the testimonies.”

Nakahinga siya nang maluwag, gustong magpasalamat sa Kano. Dahan-dahan siyang nagbaba ng mata. At nag-umpisang mangamba sa sandali na kailangan na naman niyang buksan ang lahat sa umpisa.

Kaya na ba talaga niyang magsalita nang hindi nagsisikip-nagsisiklab ang loob? Dalawampung taon na, kaya na ba niya talagang ikuwento kung paano ibinilad ng mga sundalo sa plasa ang bangkay ng kanyang asawa, kasama ng bangkay ng tatlong iba pa? Ng tatlong iba pa na pawang napatay daw sa engkuwentro?   

Mag-aanak lang iyon ng mahabang-mahabang kuwento na kakabit ng kanyang kasalukuyan…

An Older Interview: Who’s Afraid of Lualahati Bautista?, Part 1

Here’s an interview from 1999. Catchy title.

You can go to the original Philippine Daily Inquirer page here.

Who’s afraid
of Lualhati Bautista?
By Abet Zialcita
http://www.inquirer.net/saturday/jun99wk2/spc_3.htm

WHEN I was leafing through the pages of her novel, I couldn’t help but wonder about the writer behind the scenes that were playing in my mind. The lead character was a woman who didn’t have qualms about her values. She was outspoken and oftentimes candid. She could even be comical at times, without meaning to. And how she loved! When I decided that I wanted to produce her ‘’Bata, Bata, Paano Ka Ginawa?'’ onstage, therefore, I told myself that I would soon discover how much of Lea Bustamante was in Lualhati Bautista. I guessed right. Here are excerpts from our conversation:

AZ: How long have you been writing?
LB: I started writing when I was 16. By then, I already had a published work. But I had been writing stories since I learned how to read and write.

Ideas
What inspires you to write? Where do you get your ideas for your stories?
Iba-iba. I get inspired by what I see. There was a time when I was really moved when a child was run over by a speeding car. I felt at once that I wanted to write about what had transpired in his life before the accident.
Siguro, madaldal akong tao. I like telling stories. When I was still studying, madalas akong pagsabihan na ‘’very talkative'’ ako. My teacher would often tell me to keep my mouth shut. Then I finally decided to just write down the things that I could not blurt out.

So what happened was, the things you wanted to say but couldn’t, you translated into writing.
Yes, I wanted to tell stories. There were many things I wanted to share with the others. Like when you discover or experience something new, and you’d like to share it with a friend.

Can you recall your very first published work?
It was about a childless couple. They were able to adopt a child from the streets.

Was that inspired by a real incident?
I don’t remember. At that time, so many things were running in my mind. Wild things, even. Until now, when I’m all by myself, many things still enter my mind. Like, what would happen if I was given a hundred thousand pesos each day and that at the end of the day, by twelve midnight, I should have already spent all of it?

Voracious reader
Were you a voracious reader when you were young?
Lumalaki ako sa Liwayway. I read a lot of komiks and listened to radio dramas. I guess, the last one I had to, because my mom was a lover of soap operas.

Were your dad or mom also into writing?
My dad was a poet and a singer. He was a recording artist.

He must have influenced you in some ways.
Oh, yes. He also composed songs. He was a musician–he could play the piano, the guitar, the violin, the trombone. My mom couldn’t find time to write. But the few times that she did, she also displayed some flair and style.
In your formative or later years as a writer, was there any author or literary piece you admired most?
When I was young, I liked reading the writers of ‘’Liwayway.'’ They were my early models in writing. I liked their language, I envied the fact that they could narrate stories effectively. I developed a crush on them. And I got married to one of those writers!

Your husband was a writer before?
He still is. He writes stage plays. He’s more of a theater artist than a novelist. He’s in his element when he’s involved in the theater.

Stage actor
Is he also an actor onstage?
Yes, that’s in addition to also being the scriptwriter and director as well.
What about you, have you also been involved in the theater?
Not really. I’m more of a writer. I have the moods of a writer. Like, people would ask me why I shun award ceremonies. But I really hate dressing up and applying make-up! When they tell me to go up the stage for an award, I tell them that I am being penalized for a job well done.

But, as you were saying before, you won’t describe yourself as anti-social.
Ah, hindi. Hindi naman. I’m simply more inclined to join the family and a few close friends. But, of course, if I really have to attend an important function, I can easily put on the mien of a seasoned politician.
There was a time when we were in New York and we had to attend an after-dinner party. I was in T-shirt, maong jeans and rubber shoes. And then I saw the guests: the men in coat and tie, and the women in their stiletto shoes. Everyone else appeared to be taller than me but I didn’t allow myself to be intimidated.
What I did was, I took off my shoes, sat down on the carpet, drank a lot and made a lot of noise. After a while, the others were also taking off their coats and shoes, and everybody really started having fun.

Chito Roño says that you’re a writer who has successfully transcended almost all literary types of work–from novels to movie scripts to short stories to tele-plays to komiks…
Ang sabi ko nga sa kanya, e, bright ako! (Laughs).

Different literary types
From among these different literary types you do, is one you like more than the others?
Gusto ko silang lahat– for different reasons. Like, for instance, when you’re writing for TV, it is easier since the production costs are not as big as those in the movies. The movies, on the other hand, are also fun to write but they entail greater collective work among many people. By contrast, when I do a novel, it is mine and mine alone.

You have full control over the material.
Yes, but writing for the movies pays higher. With the novels, you only get paid the moment they are published, the moment they start selling. That’s what happened to ‘’Bata, Bata…,'’ ‘’Gapo'’ and ‘’Dekada ‘70.'’ They are selling up to now. Although, when I wrote these novels, I didn’t think of money. I wrote them for the Palanca competition. I wanted to win. But then, I had to momentarily drop the other things I had to do.

What is your writing style? Do you, say, start work on a novel and then at mid-point, leave it for a while and start another one?

Itutuloy…