Kinopya ba ang "Desaparesidos" ng sineng "Sigwa"? Isang liham mula kay Lualhati Bautista

DESAPARESIDOS, CHAPT 4, Excerpt 2

…

Anu’t anuman, inaasahan na ng mga kasama na malao’t madali, ilalatag sa kanila ni Anna ang mga salitang ito. Wala isa mang nag-angat ng mukha mula sa pagkakatitig sa siga sa harapan nila, sa paanan ng bundok na tinakbuhan nila pagkaraang manganib na suyurin na rin ang lugar ng kanilang safe house. Maghahatinggabi na at nasa harap pa sila ng siga. Hindi sila makatulog sa ginaw.

“Gusto kong paniwalaan ang balita na nakaligtas ang anak ko.”

Tumingin si Jinky kay Anna. Hindi sila nag-uusap sa loob ng nakaraang ilang araw para siguro kunwari, tanggap na nila ang nangyari. Saglit pang nag-alala si Anna na baka si Jinky pa ang unang sumalansang sa kagustuhan niyang bumaba. Pero iba ang naging sagot ni Jinky:

“Gano’n ang balitang nakarating sa ibang yunit.”   

Nakahinga siya nang maluwag. Kitang-kita niya, kitang-kita ng lahat kay Jinky, na tulad niya’y nangangapit din ito sa isang malabong pag-asa.  

“Wala na raw ang asawa ko, dala ang anak ni Ka Leila, nang mangyari ang masaker. Naipuslit sila ng tatay ni Ka Roy bago nangyari ang masaker!”

Wala pa ring sumagot sa mga kaharap. Sana nga, kasama; parang gusto nilang sabihin. Pero hindi pa natin kumpirmado ang balita. Ang tanging kumpirmado natin, pinatay ang buong pamilya ni Ka Roy.

Gayunman, sa kabila ng idealismo ng kanilang panahon, nauunawaan nila sina Anna at Jinky at nangangamba man sila sa seguridad ng dalawa, hindi nila pipigilan ang mga ito sa paghahanap ng katiyakan.

“Gusto ko ring hanapin ang asawa ko,” malumanay at malungkot, at may paghingi ng paumanhin, kasabay na mayroon ding determinasyon sa tinig ni Jinky.

Wala pa ring sumasagot.

Nilisa ng mga mata ni Anna ang mukha ng bawat kaharap. “Bababa ako, mga kasama. Hahanapin ko ang anak ko.”  Itinutok niya ang tingin sa masilab at malangitngit na siga. Tiyak ang malumanay na tinig niya:  “Putang ina nila… hahanapin ko ang anak ko.”

 …

DESAPARESIDOS, CHAPT 4, Excerpt 1

Mula sa Ikaapat na Kabanata

“GUSTO kong bumaba, mga kasama,” wala ni patak ng luha nang sa wakas ay magawang sabihin ni Anna sa mga kasama. “Gusto kong hanapin ang anak ko.”

Magkataliwas ang mga balitang nakakarating sa kanila. Sa isang banda, sinasabi na bago nangyari ang pagpatay at pagsunog sa buong pamilya ni Roy ay naialis ni Mang Manuel sina Karla at Malaya. Kung saan dinala, kung kanino ibinigay, iyon ang hindi nila alam. Basta ang alam nila, ipinrusisyon ng mga tao ang block rosary kahit hindi pa iyon dapat ibaba mula sa pinanggalingang bahay. Nakiprusisyon ang buong baryo para marami. Mas marami, mas makapal na tao ang magkakanlong sa buntis at sa sanggol na inihingi sa kanila ng tulong ni Mang Manuel.

Nakaabang na sa tapat ng pagdadalhang bahay ang isang kariton na hila ng kalabaw. Kung sino ang lalaking nakasambalilo na gumigiya sa kalabaw, hindi kilala ng mga tao. Ipinagpalagay na lang nila na kamag-anak iyon ni Mang Manuel kundi man kasamahan ng anak nito.

Isinampa ni Mang Manuel sa kariton sina Karla at Malaya. Iyon ang huling pagkakataon na nakita nila ang dalawa.

Pero sa isang banda, may balita din na nang pababain lahat ng tao, naiwan sa bahay ni Mang Manuel sina Karla at Malaya. Itinago daw ang bata sa baul pero may butas naman sa likod ng baul kaya hindi dapat alalahanin na hindi ito makahinga. Kung nakatago sa baul ang bata, paano iyon makakaligtas sa panununog ng mga sundalo kundi man sa rapido ng mga baril?  

At sa isang banda pa, sinasabi na  nakaligtas man sina Karla at Malaya sa bahay ni Mang Manuel, nakaligtas naman kaya ang mga ito sa pinagdalhan? Walang baryong pinatawad ang mga militar. Kinubkob lahat, daan-daan ang pinatay. Hindi man iyon nabalita sa mga diyaryo dito dahil hawak ni Marcos ang media, nabalita iyon sa mga diyaryo sa ibang bansa. Iniimbestigahan na nga iyon ng UN Commission on Human Rights.

…

Desaparesidos, Chapt 2, Excerpt 2

Mula pa rin sa ikawalang kabanata 

Simple lang ang bahay ng mga magulang ni Roy: isang karaniwang bahay-probinsiya na yari sa kahoy at kawayan. Abot-tanaw ang bukid na nememerde sa palay ng mga panahong iyon. Malamig ang dampi ng hanging labas-masok sa maluluwang na bintana. Nag-alala si Anna na baka minsa’y bumababa ang temperatura dito sa lamig na di-kayang harangin ng mga kumot at pranela. Baka ginawin ang anak niya. Yayakapin kaya ng dalawang babaing ito ang anak niya para di masyadong ginawin?

“Hindi nila sinabi sa akin na buntis ka,” matapat na sabi niya kay Karla nang magkasarilinan sila. “Paano ko iiwan sa ‘yo ang anak ko, buntis ka pala?”

“Kaya ko iyan,” nakatawang pangako ni Karla. “Hindi naman ako hirap magbuntis.”

Kinuha ni Karla ang anak niya. Pinagkasuri-suri muna ng bilog na bilog na mga mata ng anak niya si Karla, bago sumama din.

“Tignan mo, sumama agad sa akin,” pinagmasdan ni Karla ang bata. “Kamukha siya ni Nonong.”

Parang kinurot ang puso ni Anna sa pagkabanggit sa pangalan ni Nonong.

“Dinaramdam ko ang nangyari kay Nonong.”

Tumingin siya sa malayo at nag-isip ng masaya. Ang sarap sigurong manirahan dito, tiyak na aantukin ka sa tanghali. Naku, aratiles, o… ang pula-pula na ng mga bunga! Siguro sa gabi, naglipana dito ang alitaptap. Ang hilig-hilig ko pa namang panoorin ang mga alitaptap! Ikaw, Karla, mahilig ka rin ba sa mga alitaptap na tulad ko?

“Dadating din ang araw ng paghihiganti, Ka Leila,” sinabi iyon ni Karla sa paraan ng mataimtim na pangako.

Sinikap niyang ngumiti. Tinatanggap ang mga kamatayan sa loob ng kilusan. Hindi iniiyakan nang matagal, hindi pinag-uusapan nang madalas.

“Salamat,” sabi niya.

Iniangat ni Karla ang bata, saglit na muling pinagmasdan at niyakap. Nakangiti na ito nang tumingin sa kanya. “Ano ang pangalan ng anak mo?”

“Malaya.”

Nagulat, tumawa nang mahina si Karla. “Magkatukayo pa pala sila ng magiging baby ko,” hinalikan nito si Malaya. “Di bale, puwede naman kayong magsukob sa pangalan… magsukob sa iisang bandila ng pakikibaka.”

Ewan niya kung bakit at paano pero biglang-bigla, dinapuan siya ng isang uri ng kaba na nagpaalsa sa mga kilabot ng kanyang balat. Na baka hindi na sila muling magkita pa ng kanyang si Malaya!

Desaparesidos, Chapt 2, Excerpt 1

Mula sa ikalawang kabanata

…

HINDI tanga ang militar. Bigo man silang “pakantahin” si Tatay Dencio, kinamatayan man nito ang pagtatakip sa manugang at mga kasamahan nito, alam nila na hindi nito matutunton ang anak kung walang rebelde sa loob mismo ng munisipalidad. Pinaghinalaan nila ang mga tagabaryo, tinalasan ang mata at pakiramdam laban sa bawat isang lalaki, babae, bata, at matanda. Ginawang suwertihan na lang ang laban. Alaberde na lang, bahala na si Batman! Sayang na lang na sila’y sundalo kung hindi nila kayang ipagtanggol ang bayan! Sinona ang mga baryo, pinababa at minasaker ang maraming ama, hinamlet ang iba pa, hinugot ang mga tao sa katwiran na hindi mabubuhay ang isda kung walang tubig; hindi makakapamayagpag ang mga rebelde kung walang taong-bayan na kukupkop at magpapakain sa kanila.Tumawid ang gulo hanggang kabilang munisipalidad. Dinukot ang political officer ng isang unit at ni bangkay nito ay hindi na nakita pa. Ni-raid ang bahay ng isang kaalyado na ipinapalagay pa naman nila na pinaka-safe sa lahat ng posibleng takbuhan sa pinakagipit na kalagayan… paano nangyari na kung alin pa ang iniisip nilang pinaka-safe, ay siya pang unang napasok ng mga kaaway?

“Pinagdodoble-ingat tayo ng mga nasa itaas. May ajax daw sa atin.”

Napatingin siya sa mukha ni Roy. Napatingin din kay Roy ang iba pa. May kabadong tanong na sumungaw sa mukha ng bawa’t isa. ako ba iyon? Pinaghihinalaan n’yo ba ako, kasama?

“Kailangan din nating lumipat ng lugar. Anim na buwan na tayo dito, baka tukoy na tayo. Mainit ang kalagayan.”

Napayakap nang mahigpit si Anna sa anak. Paano na sila ng baby niya?

“Paano na kami ng baby ko, Ka Roy?”

“Gusto mo ba munang lumabas?”

Natigilan siya sa tanong, nagtalo ang isip sa pagitan ng oo at hindi. Nababasa ba ni Roy sa mukha niya na paminsan-minsan, sumasagi din sa isip niya na gusto muna niyang lumabas alang-alang sa kanyang anak?

Pero, saan naman sila pupunta ng baby niya? Uuwi ba siya sa bahay ng kanyang mga magulang? Delikado siya roon, na-raid na iyon noon. Saka hindi niya alam kung welcome pa siya sa magulang. Ang alam niya hanggang ngayon, sinisisi siya ng tatay niya na kung hindi sa “kalokohan” niya, hindi magugulo pati ang buhay ng lahat.

Kung mananatili naman siya dito, paano ang baby niya? Paano ang kaligtasan ng baby niya?

“Iniisip ko lang ang baby ko,” sabi niya.

“Maiintindihan namin kung gusto mo munang lumabas.”

“Baka pagsisihan ko. Baka araw-araw, gusto kong bumalik.”

“Kailangan ka namin dito, Ka Leila.” Leila ang pangalan niya sa kilusan. Walang taga-kilusan na gumagamit ng tunay na pangalan.

…
 

An Older Interview: Who’s Afraid of Lualhati Bautista?, Part 2

Continued from yesterday…

Original source here.

What is your writing style? Do you, say, start work on a novel and then at mid-point, leave it for a while and start another one? I don’t do that. I finish one thing at a time, I don’t overlap writing commitments. For instance, at the moment, I’m supposed to finish seven scripts for the NCCA. I’ve already done two, five more to go. So I tell people I can’t start work on another project for the next two months. By then, however, I’ve already set my priorities for the succeeding periods of time. And if I don’t like certain projects, I tell people right away. Interest in a project, for me, is very important. If I have the slightest doubt about a project, I don’t accept it.

Favorite work
From everything you’ve written, do you have any favorite literary work?
Ah, ‘yong ‘’Bata, Bata…'’ pa rin. “yong ‘’Deakada,'’ mahal na mahal ko ‘yon. With ‘’Bata, Bata…,'’ my enthusiasm never died down. When we were doing the movie, I was attending presscons and premieres. Of course, I also treasure my having done ‘’Dekada,'’ but ‘’Bata, Bata…'’ had created a greater impact in the market.

How would you describe your style in writing? Any disciplines you observe?
None. Even with young writers, I tell them not to observe any guidelines. They should feel free, they should experiment. They should discover and develop their own bent.

Can you cite two things you love about yourself?
I love feeling free. I love locking myself up in my room. I love being able to go wherever I want to go and be with the people I want to be with.

Two things you hate?
My smoking, I’ve long wanted to give it up. And then there are the tantrums I can’t control. I wish I could be a more diplomatic person. Like Marilou Diaz-Abaya, she can say anything in a nice way. For example, I wouldn’t be reluctant to ask at the recent Famas awards: How could I win for Best Story when I was not even nominated in the Best Screenplay category? It is through the screenplay that one learns about the story.

Citations
‘’Bata, Bata…'’ garnered a lot of citations from award-giving bodies this year…
It won Best Picture and Best Screenplay from the Urian. Best Picture and Best Screenplay from the Young Critics Circle. From the Famas, Best Story.

Where did you get your idea for writing ‘’Bata, Bata?'’
The idea came from a long period of experiences of being a woman. When I was a young girl, the little boys would jump over flower pots and people would think that was OK. But when I did it, they would say: ‘’Ka babae mong tao, ginagawa mo ‘yan!'’ And then, the young boys could slip a note into young girls’ books to propose, but people wouldn’t expect young girls to do the same.

If we were in an ideal world, you would say that even the girls would have the right to propose?
I have taken that right a long time ago!

How much of yourself do you see in Lea Bustamante?
A big part. Everybody’s been accusing me of that. A lot of her feelings and sentiments are mine. She had my heart.

When I was reading your novel, I told myself that what I was reading was true. That the writer was not simply fabricating things.
Through Lea, I had an opportunity to say whatever was on my mind. Like, when we’re mad, we curse.

I read a lot of that in your novel.

Real life
That happens in real life. So why should it be any different in a novel or a movie?

When Raffy and Ding were leaving Lea, she didn’t fight for the custody of her two children, she allowed them to make their own decision. Would you have done the same thing in real life?

Lea is confident of herself. She trusts in the love that she has shown her children.

The last time we talked, you were saying that you were working on a new novel.
Not exactly new. I started working on it in 1993, but I’m not done yet. I can’t tell you the theme for ‘’security'’ reasons.

How does the rest of 1999 appear to you?
There’s still a lot to be done. It was high gear in 1998, and it’s spilling over to 1999. But probably, in the next few months, I’ll declare a time-out. I need time for myself!

('’Bata, Bata…'’ the stage play, will be shown in August, 1999 at the UP, AFP and Greenhills theaters. For inquiries, please call 893-4492.)

For bulk orders and discounts, please call Cacho Publishing House, +632/6318361 or fax +632/6315244.
 

Desaparesidos, Chapt 1, Excerpt 2

. . . Biglang naisip ni Anna na baka hindi lang nagugulat ang mga dayuhan dahil matagal na nilang “alam” na primitibo naman ang Pilipinas, uncivilized, at kumakain talaga ng tao. Nakaramdam siya ng pagkapahiya. Biglang gusto niyang tumindig at sabihin: “Excuse me, ladies and gentlemen, sa mga vigilante group lang po iyon. Hindi pa lahat kami, gano’n. Sila lang po ang cannibal; hindi po lahat kami. Excuse me, ladies and gentlemen!”   

“This one is Anna’s husband.”    

Napaangat ang mukha ni Anna. Tumahip ang dibdib niya, malakas, mabilis, kabit-kabit. Dalawampung taon mula nang mangyari iyon at hindi pa rin niya maiwasan ang parang tarak ng patalim sa puso niya.    

Tuluy-tuloy ang pagsasalita ni Sister Lourdes. “He was killed by soldiers of the 24th Infantry Battalion. His body was displayed at the town plaza. Inspite of the very tight security, a visiting photographer somehow managed to take this picture. Anna, would you like to talk a little about Nonong?”

 Nakatingin na kay Anna ang lahat. Sa kanya nakatingin si Sister Lourdes at iglap, alam ng mga bisita na siya na iyon, siya si Anna. . . .

Gusto niyang sitahin, pagalitan, si Sister Lourdes. Kung magreport ka ng tungkol sa mga pinatay, parang nagrereport ka lang ng lagay ng panahon. Parang hindi mo na feel, Sister. Parang wala naman sila talaga sa puso mo.

May nagsalita ng “never mind”. Boses-lalaki, boses-kano. “She can talk about him later, when we hear the testimonies.”

Nakahinga siya nang maluwag, gustong magpasalamat sa Kano. Dahan-dahan siyang nagbaba ng mata. At nag-umpisang mangamba sa sandali na kailangan na naman niyang buksan ang lahat sa umpisa.

Kaya na ba talaga niyang magsalita nang hindi nagsisikip-nagsisiklab ang loob? Dalawampung taon na, kaya na ba niya talagang ikuwento kung paano ibinilad ng mga sundalo sa plasa ang bangkay ng kanyang asawa, kasama ng bangkay ng tatlong iba pa? Ng tatlong iba pa na pawang napatay daw sa engkuwentro?   

Mag-aanak lang iyon ng mahabang-mahabang kuwento na kakabit ng kanyang kasalukuyan…

An Older Interview: Who’s Afraid of Lualahati Bautista?, Part 1

Here’s an interview from 1999. Catchy title.

You can go to the original Philippine Daily Inquirer page here.

Who’s afraid
of Lualhati Bautista?
By Abet Zialcita
http://www.inquirer.net/saturday/jun99wk2/spc_3.htm

WHEN I was leafing through the pages of her novel, I couldn’t help but wonder about the writer behind the scenes that were playing in my mind. The lead character was a woman who didn’t have qualms about her values. She was outspoken and oftentimes candid. She could even be comical at times, without meaning to. And how she loved! When I decided that I wanted to produce her ‘’Bata, Bata, Paano Ka Ginawa?'’ onstage, therefore, I told myself that I would soon discover how much of Lea Bustamante was in Lualhati Bautista. I guessed right. Here are excerpts from our conversation:

AZ: How long have you been writing?
LB: I started writing when I was 16. By then, I already had a published work. But I had been writing stories since I learned how to read and write.

Ideas
What inspires you to write? Where do you get your ideas for your stories?
Iba-iba. I get inspired by what I see. There was a time when I was really moved when a child was run over by a speeding car. I felt at once that I wanted to write about what had transpired in his life before the accident.
Siguro, madaldal akong tao. I like telling stories. When I was still studying, madalas akong pagsabihan na ‘’very talkative'’ ako. My teacher would often tell me to keep my mouth shut. Then I finally decided to just write down the things that I could not blurt out.

So what happened was, the things you wanted to say but couldn’t, you translated into writing.
Yes, I wanted to tell stories. There were many things I wanted to share with the others. Like when you discover or experience something new, and you’d like to share it with a friend.

Can you recall your very first published work?
It was about a childless couple. They were able to adopt a child from the streets.

Was that inspired by a real incident?
I don’t remember. At that time, so many things were running in my mind. Wild things, even. Until now, when I’m all by myself, many things still enter my mind. Like, what would happen if I was given a hundred thousand pesos each day and that at the end of the day, by twelve midnight, I should have already spent all of it?

Voracious reader
Were you a voracious reader when you were young?
Lumalaki ako sa Liwayway. I read a lot of komiks and listened to radio dramas. I guess, the last one I had to, because my mom was a lover of soap operas.

Were your dad or mom also into writing?
My dad was a poet and a singer. He was a recording artist.

He must have influenced you in some ways.
Oh, yes. He also composed songs. He was a musician–he could play the piano, the guitar, the violin, the trombone. My mom couldn’t find time to write. But the few times that she did, she also displayed some flair and style.
In your formative or later years as a writer, was there any author or literary piece you admired most?
When I was young, I liked reading the writers of ‘’Liwayway.'’ They were my early models in writing. I liked their language, I envied the fact that they could narrate stories effectively. I developed a crush on them. And I got married to one of those writers!

Your husband was a writer before?
He still is. He writes stage plays. He’s more of a theater artist than a novelist. He’s in his element when he’s involved in the theater.

Stage actor
Is he also an actor onstage?
Yes, that’s in addition to also being the scriptwriter and director as well.
What about you, have you also been involved in the theater?
Not really. I’m more of a writer. I have the moods of a writer. Like, people would ask me why I shun award ceremonies. But I really hate dressing up and applying make-up! When they tell me to go up the stage for an award, I tell them that I am being penalized for a job well done.

But, as you were saying before, you won’t describe yourself as anti-social.
Ah, hindi. Hindi naman. I’m simply more inclined to join the family and a few close friends. But, of course, if I really have to attend an important function, I can easily put on the mien of a seasoned politician.
There was a time when we were in New York and we had to attend an after-dinner party. I was in T-shirt, maong jeans and rubber shoes. And then I saw the guests: the men in coat and tie, and the women in their stiletto shoes. Everyone else appeared to be taller than me but I didn’t allow myself to be intimidated.
What I did was, I took off my shoes, sat down on the carpet, drank a lot and made a lot of noise. After a while, the others were also taking off their coats and shoes, and everybody really started having fun.

Chito Roño says that you’re a writer who has successfully transcended almost all literary types of work–from novels to movie scripts to short stories to tele-plays to komiks…
Ang sabi ko nga sa kanya, e, bright ako! (Laughs).

Different literary types
From among these different literary types you do, is one you like more than the others?
Gusto ko silang lahat– for different reasons. Like, for instance, when you’re writing for TV, it is easier since the production costs are not as big as those in the movies. The movies, on the other hand, are also fun to write but they entail greater collective work among many people. By contrast, when I do a novel, it is mine and mine alone.

You have full control over the material.
Yes, but writing for the movies pays higher. With the novels, you only get paid the moment they are published, the moment they start selling. That’s what happened to ‘’Bata, Bata…,'’ ‘’Gapo'’ and ‘’Dekada ‘70.'’ They are selling up to now. Although, when I wrote these novels, I didn’t think of money. I wrote them for the Palanca competition. I wanted to win. But then, I had to momentarily drop the other things I had to do.

What is your writing style? Do you, say, start work on a novel and then at mid-point, leave it for a while and start another one?

Itutuloy… 

Desaparesidos, Chapt 1 excerpt 1

DESAPARESIDOS

nobela ni: LUALHATI BAUTISTA

unang kabanata

“THIS here is the body of a sixteen-year old girl who was raped and killed by elements of a vigilante group,” sinasabi ni Sister Lourdes habang naka-freeze sa screen ng slide presentation ang larawan ng isang binitay sa panahon ng martial law. Nakatali pa rin sa leeg nito ang makapal na lubid, tapyas at duguan ang dalawang suso. Di man lang binura ng kamatayan ang latay ng lagim at pagkamulagat sa mukha nito.

Tahimik ang lahat sa loob ng audio-visual room na pinagdadausan ng slide presentation. Tahimik at walang galaw sa kanya-kanyang kinuupuan. Kaya mong marinig ang tunog ng nahulog na karayom sa sobrang pagkatahimik, bagamat eksaheradong sabihin ito.

“As you can see, both her breasts were cut off, presumably eaten by elements of the vigilante group,” sa inggles nagsasalita si Sister Lourdes para sa kapakanan ng mga dayuhang mamamahayag, kinatawan ng Amnesty International, at abugadong Amerkano na padala ng isang law office sa Amerika. “For some perverse reason, these elements are said to have taken to eating parts of the body of their victims, believing they say, that it will somehow increase their strength and virility.”

Wala pa ring nagugulat o nagre-react sa mga nanonood. Baka naman kasi luma na sa kanila ang balita ng pagkain sa parte-parte ng katawan ng isang pinatay. . . .

PDInquirer interview, Part 2

… continued from yesterday

Click this to go to source link 


Writing about the intense days during martial law is something she had wanted to stop doing after “Dekada ‘70” and two or three other teleplays about the period, says Bautista. “But there are still so many stories waiting to be told about that era.” While set against the backdrop of those turbulent years, the two novels are also vastly different: “”Dekada” is more about a family outside the movement, a mother on the outside looking in. This is really more about a mother who changes her perception of herself and of society (because of her son’s activism). ‘Desaparesidos” is about people inside the movement, young people who lived the horror of militarization during the martial law period.”
“Desaparesidos” might as well be the story of her friends, she says. “Before and after martial law, there were many disappearances. Charlie del Rosario disappeared; I knew him in college. Henry Romero disappeared; he was my friend and godfather to my firstborn.”
Not that things have changed much, she acknowledges. “What is the difference between martial law and the years after if people are still being killed all the time, if they keep disappearing because they are presumed to be enemies of government?” she asks. “I may not know her personally but I feel the pain of Edith Burgos over her missing son, Jonas, just as I felt the pain of Gina de Venecia when she lost her child in a fire. I feel bonded with all the mothers who lost their children in the past and present regimes. Whenever I read about Edith’s search for her son in the papers, I want to hug her even if I tell her nothing because even a writer can be at a loss for words.”
But as harsh as that reality is, Bautista also defines “Desaparesidos” in a different, albeit just as traumatic, context in this novel. Not only does the term refer to friends and kin who were deemed disappeared or missing because of state or military forces, the word also speaks of the disappearance or absence of activist parents in the lives of their children as they elude arrest to pursue their revolutionary goals.
Again, personal history has a lot to do with this insight. “When my children were very young, I could not leave them with just anybody,” recounts Bautista. “But I have known mothers in the movement who did that. Mas mabuti ba akong nanay kaysa sa kanila, o mas mabuti lang silang anak ng bayan kaysa sa akin? (Am I a better mother than them, or are they better patriots than I am?) Hindi ko ba mahal nang sapat ang bayan ko para iwan ang mga anak ko, o hindi nila mahal nang sapat ang kanilang mga anak? (Don’t I love my country enough to leave my kids, or don’t they love their children enough?) I have no answers to that.”
In fact, she adds, the questions she raised in the novel about commitment, priorities and choosing between family and country should not even be asked of those who had to make that difficult decision. While she writes of truths that she has come to know and of people in such circumstances, it is not for her to judge them nor direct their lives, she says. “When I write, I do not think of my characters as my creation; I think of them as real people. I don’t direct them, I just follow their story.”
Her next novel, to be serialized in a vernacular magazine, similarly follows the story of women in their sixties who are fighting to live their own lives, refusing to become wards of their children and nannies to their grandchildren.
But how typical! After a novel on the “disappeared,” trust this unconventional writer to focus next on women who have finally found themselves.

“Desaparesidos” is available at all National Book Store branches.

For bulk orders and discounts, please call Cacho Publishing House +632/6318361

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PDInquirer Interview, Part 1

Before we start posting excerpts from Desaparesidos, we will share a couple of interviews with the great author herself. (We have gotten permission from bnoth the author and the interviewer).

Here’s the original link:

http://showbizandstyle.inquirer.net/sim/sim/view/20080615-142756/Her-Fathers-Daughter

Her Father’s Daughter
By Pennie Azarcon dela Cruz
Philippine Daily Inquirer
First Posted 02:17:00 06/15/2008

MANILA, Philippines - She has written novels and screenplays on subjects other writers dare not touch: strong women defying conventions (“Bata, Bata, Paano Ka Ginawa?”), a conflicted family coming to terms with martial law (“Dekada 70′), life among women inmates (“Bulaklak sa City Jail”), and ac-tivist parents agonizing over children waylaid in the confusion of a military raid (“Desaparesidos”).
But there is one movie that prize-winning novelist Lualhati Bautista dreams of doing someday: a small independent film about her father, Esteban. A sometime real estate agent, musician, photographer and singer, this father of nine is best remembered for the boundless imagination that gild his homespun bedtime stories.
“When I was very young, my father had this telescope and together, we would peek at the stars,” recalls Bautista in Filipino. “One time I asked him, how can I go visit those stars? And he said, someday, I’m going to build a ladder that you can climb all the way to the stars. I asked, and what about you? Are you coming with me? And he said, no, I’m staying down here to catch you should you fall. But I’m sure you won’t fall. Because you are not afraid to climb.”
Adds Bautista: “My father opened my imagination wide. At night when it was warm and we couldn’t sleep, he’d fan us till we dozed off. Sasabihin niya, kunwari daw, inihaw na mais kami! (He’d say, just pretend that you’re corn on the cob, grilling.)”
From him she got her love of words, recalls this writer whose first story was published when she was 17. “My father was a composer, singer and writer of poetry,” she says proudly. And so Bautista wanted to be two things: writer and singer. “But singing was out of the question,” she confesses. “Once my brother told his friends defiantly: “Ang kapatid ko ay isang mahusay na manunulat! (My sister is a good writer)! I just happened to be singing at that time.”
Well, one out of two ain’t bad. By the time Esteban Castel Bautista died on Valentine’s Day in 1992, his writer-daughter has become a household word in Filipino literature, while he remains very much in her mind. “I want to write about the music of my father’s violin,” says Bautista. “That music used to wake me so I won’t be late for school.” She adds: “I want to write about him and his kindness together with all his imperfections, especially when I read or watch something that portray fathers in a bad light. Gusto kong ibangon ang dangal ng mga ama, gano’n (I want to restore our faith in fathers.)”
Reading about fathers in Bautista’s novels is definitely something to look forward to. Fatherhood is a subject she rarely tackles in her novels, most of which portray female characters breaching boundaries to redefine their role in the family. Bautista’s latest work, “Desaparesidos,” tells of how one mother retooled her life to look for the toddler she had entrusted to another activist in the heat of a military operation during martial law.
The circumstances hit close to home, the writer confides. “I had very little political consciousness when I got married,” says Bautista. “But my husband was an activist. I would not say that I joined the (underground Left), only that I joined my husband. It was his life, not mine. But I could not live his life without losing mine in the process.
“Three months later I left. I was pregnant and had a 3-year-old boy in tow. I had no money, no place to return to, no work because at that time, even a writer had to get clearance from the Office for Civil Relations, otherwise, no publication would accept your story. And I was too proud to go home to my parents.”
She continues: “When I think of that young woman kissing her husband goodbye and walking down the street holding her child’s hand, trying to look brave and planning only where to sleep that night, I feel very very proud of her. I was that woman, and I’ve come a long long way.”
It wasn’t an easy leave-taking, Bautista recalls. “Before I left, the other people in the movement offered to take care of my son. Of course I said no. Imagine leaving my son with (people who were on the run?) What if something happened to them? Where and how do I start looking for my son? I even imagined how the military could use children against their parents when they get caught: ‘talk, or we’ll kill your child while you watch!’ It had happened to others. I think in a way, as early as 1973, I was already sowing the seeds for this novel.”

Itutuloy…

Introduksiyon sa Desaparesidos, Part 2

Ang estilo sa paggamit ng wika ng Desparesidos ay hindi nalalayo sa estilong Taglish ng Dekada ’70 kaya’t magaang basahin ng kontemporaryong mambabasa, lalo ng mga mambabasang kabilang sa gitnang uri. Kontrobersiyal na aspekto ito ng sining ng pagsusulat ni Bautista. Noong pinag-usapan ng hurado para sa Palanca Award sa nobela noong 1982-23, nagbantulot ang yumaong manunulat na si Liwayway Arceo na gawaran ang Dekada ’70 ng Unang Gantimpala, dahil ang wika ng nobela ay “kulang sa kinis” bunga ng paghahalo nito ng Ingles at Tagalog. Subalit nanaig pa rin ang desisyon naming naniniwala na mas matimbang sa usapin ng estilo ang kabuluhan ng nilalaman ng nobela. Gayon pa rin ang masasabi tungkol sa gamit sa wika ng Desaparesidos. Sensitibong humawak ng Tagalog si Bautista gaya ng pinatutunayan ng mga bahaging tulad ng nasa ibaba:         Nagpakasal sila, silang dalawang tao na ang buhay ay pinabigat
        ng mga kamatayan at pagkawala, dalawang anak ng kanilang
        panahon na magkasukob sa malagim na mga pahina ng
        kasaysayan.
Ang “magaspang” na wika ni Bautista ay hindi kapintasan sa isang awtor na nakasusulat ng ganyang pangungusap. May dahilan siya kapag lumilihis siya sa “pinong” pananagalog, dahilang gayumpaman ay maaaring pasubalian ng mga kritiko.

Ang tagumpay ni Bautista ay mahirap ihanap ng katapat sa mga akda ng mga kapanahon niya. Damang-dama ang antak ng kanyang karanasang pinapaksa sa mabagsik na prosang humihiwa sa gunita ng mambabasa at iniiwang gulilat ang ating mga pandama. Nakapanlulumo ang paglalarawan niya sa tortyur ng mga kasamang nahuli at pinatutuga ng militar. Sina Anna at Roy ay hindi lamang dinahas kundi lubhang sinalaula ng pagpapahirap na dinanas nila sa kamay ng mga sundalo. Litaw na litaw ito sa tagpo nang nagtatalik ang dalawa at ang ligaya na dapat ibunga ng pagsasanib ng kanilang katawan ay inuunsiyami ng mga gunita ng kababuyang pinagdaanan nila sa kamay ng humuli sa kanila. Sa pagsasalaysay ni Bautista sa paggigiit ni Anna sa kanyang walang-humpay na paghahanap, sa pagharap ng mga tauhan sa mga kontradiksiyong nakalikaw sa kanilang relasyon sa isa’t isa, at sa pag-arok nina Anna, Roy, Karla at Jinky sa kanya-kanyang dahilan sa pananatili at sa pagkalas sa kilusan, pinatunayan ng awtor ang kanyang malalim na pagsapol sa sikolohiya ng mga taong dumaranas ng kagipitang pisikal at espiritwal. Kung paghahambingin ang timbang ng dating ng Desaparesidos at ng Dekada ’70, di-hamak na mabigat at matindi ang bagong nobela na nagpapakilala sa atin ng manunulat na pagkaraan ng 20 taon ay tunay nang “taga sa panahon.”

Introduksiyon sa Desaparesidos, Part 1

INTRODUKSIYON (sa Desaparesidos)ni Bienvenido L. Lumbera, National Artist for Literature
Akala natin ay nasabi nang lahat ang gustong sabihin ni Lualhati Bautista tungkol sa bisa ng Martial Law sa pamilyang Filipino sa kanyang Dekada ’70. Pero narito ang Desaparesidos, at kalunos-lunos ang nilalaman ng bagong nobela tungkol sa paglasog ng mga kabuktutang militar sa pamilya ng mga rebolusyonaryong nasa kanayunan sa panahon ng diktadura. Tungkol ito kay Anna at ang pagkawala ng kanyang sanggol sa raid sa isang baryo, at ang 20-taong paghahanap ng ina sa kanyang anak na si Malaya. Kahanga-hanga ang ipinamalas dito ni Bautista na kakayahang maigting na hagipin ang kamalayan ng mambabasa at mariing tatakan ito ng malalagim at makabagbag-damdaming mga tagpo. Ito na marahil ang di-mapasusubaliang katibayan na tunay na karapatan ng awtor na angkinin ang karangalan bilang pangunahing kontemporaryong nobelista ng ating panahon.

Dalawampung taong nang nawakasan ng EDSA I ang Martial Law at si Anna, na dati’y aktibong kumilos bilang Pulang mandirigma sa kanayunan, ay naglilingkod sa isang NGO na naghahanda ng kaso laban sa mag-asawang Marcos. Siya at ang kanyang asawang si Roy, na kasama niya sa pagkilos noon, ay di makaiwas sa paggunita sa kanilang pinagdaanan at sa mga kasamang dumanas ng karahasan bilang bahagi ng kilusang pinamunuan ng CCP. Ang mag-asawang Jinky at Karla ang tanging nalalaman nilang ugnay sa hinahanap nilang anak. Subalit si Jinky ay patay na at si Karla ay hindi nila matunton. “Suntok sa buwan” lamang ang walang puknat na paghahanap ng mag-asawa kay Malaya. Sa unang bahagi ng nobela, ang katagang “desaparesidos” ay tumutukoy sa nawawalang anak. Sa ikalawang bahagi, nagbabago ang pakahulugan sa pamagat ng nobela pagkat itinuon ni Bautista ang banghay sa paghahanap ng anak ng rebolusyonaryong magulang sa ”nawawalang” ama at ina. Si Lorena ang panganay nina Roy at Anna ay pinatibay ang sarili sa kanyang paglaking malayo sa magulang. Kinikim niya ang kanyang tampo at hinanakit at nagpakamanhid sa pagmamahal ng ama at ina kahit sa panahong magkakapisan na sila bilang pamilya. Si Malaya namang pinalaki sa paniniwala na ang tatay niya ay si Jinky, na sinasabing pinatay ng mga NPA dahil sa pagkakanulo nito sa mga kasama nang siya ay dumaranas ng tortyur, ay ayaw maniwala na taksil ang ama kaya’t humanap ng kumpirmasyon na bayani ng kilusan si Jinky.

Itutuloy…

Kamusta

Welcome! In this blog, you will find excerpts from Lualhati Bautista’s latest novel: Desaparesidos. You will also find information about Lualhati Bautista, author of Dekada ‘70, Bata, Bata, Pa’ano Ka Ginawa?, and ‘Gapo, novels being read by Filipino youth all over the country, novels which have made her the Philippines’s bestselling writer in contemporary Filipino today.

Our next posts will contain the complete Intro to Desaparesidos. This was written by no less than Dr Bienvenido Lumbera, the country’s top literary critic and a National Artist for Literature.

Abangan.